


The feeling of loss

by Riko_Ihe



Category: Bleach
Genre: Gen, Hitsugaya-centric
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-02
Updated: 2014-08-02
Packaged: 2018-02-11 11:14:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 625
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2066058
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Riko_Ihe/pseuds/Riko_Ihe
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After the recent events, Toshirou takes time to think of his relations to the three betrayers.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The feeling of loss

Kaname Tousen

 

Toshirou had never been close to Tousen. He had always thought Tousen to be suspicious, the way he hung on Aizen's every word, and coupled with the big bulk of Komamura that followed him around like a lost puppy, _the irony of that,_ Toshirou never thought of talking to him.

 

The only memory of Tousen that stood out to him was when Toshirou had been a third seat. His captain then, _good great Shiba-taichou who always knew how to make Toshirou feel better_ , had greeted him happily, forcing Tousen to stop to return the greeting. Ignoring a fellow captain would not be good. The captains had talked for a while, and before Tousen left, he vividly remembered his own captain praising him to the heavens and him not knowing how to react to praise, however Tousen had agreed, and said a few praising words of his own.

 

All in all, the only memory of Tousen that stood out to him, was a memory that included his old captain, _precious, precious memories of Shiba-taichou must not be forgotten,_ and Kaname Tousen was not what left him with the feeling of loss, of real, gut-wrenching betrayal.

 

Aizen Sousuke

 

Aizen had, for all his nice smiles and pleasant manners, been more suspicious to Toshirou than Tousen had been. _Too nice, not normal to be so nice, can't trust._ Toshirou had always made great efforts to talk as little to Aizen as possible, the handy excuse of a lazy lieutnant was always good.

 

As with Tousen, the only memory of Aizen that stood out to Toshirou was a few days before his captain had dissapeared, he had run into Aizen on his way to deliver his reports to the Captain-Commander. Aizen had apologized and smiled at him, _not good, not nice, don't trust,_ and he had started talking to him, Toshirou had to steel himself just so he wouldn't run off. In the end his captain had turned up, _Shiba-taichou was good, nice, real, can be trusted,_ wondering why Toshirou had taken so long. Toshirou had secretly been overjoyed that his captain had been worried enough to search for him.

 

In the end, the only memory of Aizen that stood out to him, was also one with his old captain. After all, _precious, precious memories of Shiba-taichou must not be forgotten,_ and Aizen had not left him with the feeling of loss either.

 

Ichimaru Gin

 

Ichimaru had been so suspicious to all, that he seemed the least suspicious. Way too wide smile and sarcastic remarks _, like, trust, won't kill you,_ and he had a particular fascination with annoying Toshirou.

 

Memories that stood out with Ichimaru were uncountable, perhaps that one time Toshirou could not take his remarks any longer and secretly glued Ichimaru's snacks to the roof. Ichimaru had come to him the day after and talked about it like he knew who did it, he most likely did, but never accused Toshirou of it. Or that other time when both he and Ichimaru were set to do extra paperwork in the first divison because they had fallen asleep in the middle of a meeting. Toshirou thoroughly blamed Ichimaru for that, the man thought it was funny to let birds and frogs and a endless amount of bugs loose in the tenth division barracks. The screams kept him awake.

 

So in the end it was Ichimaru, with his unlikely companionship and annoying pranks, that left Toshirou feeling betrayed. Like he had lost a good friend, though he'd never admit to anyone that Ichimaru was actually a friend of his. In the end, his  _precious, precious memories of Shiba-taichou must not be forgotten,_ was stored right next to  _precious, precious memories of Ichimaru Gin must not be forgotten._

**Author's Note:**

> Uh so I tried to tie Toshirou's admiration for his captain into this? And to make it seem like Aizen and Tousen never really mattered much to Toshirou, because his admiration of his captain high-lighted memories of them. Just a headcanon that Toshirou and Gin actually liked to make pranks, but Toshirou held back until Gin practically threw him over the edge and made him retaliate


End file.
